PLEASE HELP. My large adult son has been missing for much of this year. He’s been in Iowa, South Carolina, and New Hampshire, and he was last seen fleeing the country on a “trade mission” to Asia following the LAPD’s murder of Melyda Corado.
His mother and I worry that his lust for fame and his preparations for the presidential campaign he swears he’s definitely not considering are destroying our city. If found, can you please return our dear, confused boy to Los Angeles so he can do his fucking job?
– Gil